Every meditation is filled with mental distractions. But some mornings, my mind seems especially impossible. Like there is a fog in my brain hovering over a sheet of ice atop of which all kinds of distractions scurry, slide and skate around like herds of little rodents. The mind is both slow and busy: it is too slow to react and too fast to keep track of. It’s easy during those times for me to feel that I’ve had a bad meditation, to feel discouraged or frustrated. But usually, having a lot of mental distractions simply means that I especially needed the time of silence. As such, the irony is that my worst meditation is sometimes my best meditation because it is most helpful for keeping me centered even when my mind is not.
Writer. In the summers, I live and work in the incredible state of Alaska, in the bush community of McCarthy, as the Executive Director of the Wrangell Mountain Center. When not in McCarthy, you'll typically find me in the Santa Cruz Mountains of California, writing and working with local activists. My primary writing project right now is a novel set in remote bush Alaska, of the magical realism genre wherein an earnest and independent young woman finds a mysterious radio belonging to her grandmother, a device that has paranormal bandwidth and a disturbing ability to mess with one's mental stability. View all posts by Jonathan Erdman